2. Order a drink with whiskey, pretend you like it.
3. Have a friend or loved one text you periodically
4. If no one's bought into it yet, pretend to pick up a call: Talk about nachos, ask your roommate if they're sure they set the DVR to tape the game (doesn't matter what game, there's always one going on), tell them they still owe you beer from the other night, whatever, you get it, along those lines.
5. Wait, repeat if desired
*may also be a good idea to skim sports center that day, doesn't matter if you're interested just be able to recite random facts, if in doubt, change the subject or order another whiskey.
**If you're at some weird bar and for some reason they're not biting (s&m enthusiasts, salsa dancing club, hardcore bands, euro techno (switch to soccer)), just take off your bra and flash your nips, it's nearly foolproof.
Even hipster boys can't resist secretly watching ESPN on occasion. Of course it's with the door locked and headphones on, better for roommates to think their jacking off all the time to Zooey Deschanel indie movies and bikini girls on fixed gears than watching sports center.
I rest my case:
Dun na na Dun na na
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